Fractions for seven year olds...

 S (7 y/o, thoughtfully): I'm a siúnicorn: half cat, half unicorn, and half person.

People from the Olden Days

We're in the kitchen, talking about different expressions people use when someone sneezes, while C does his best to avoid emptying the dishwasher.

Me: "In Germany, when someone sneezes, you say 'Gesundheit', which means 'good health' - even though sneezing usually doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you. I guess people in the olden days didn't know as much about medicine as we do now."

C (8 y/o): "But Daddy, aren't you one of the people from the olden days?"

Learning from YouTube

 The 6 y/o has decided she will become a surgeon, while watching ER.

S (6 y/o): "I don't need to go to medical school. I can just learn everything from YouTube."

Misheard words

C (10 y/o, shouted at her younger sister): You're adopted!

S (8 y/o): You're a donkey too!

The scary bathroom...

 S (6 y/o, shouted while running down the stairs): It's okay! I'll use the scary bathroom!

I have no idea why one of our bathrooms is scary. None.

Memory lapse

S (6 y/o): I'm good at hugging... except that one time I forgot.

Me: That sounds serious. What happened?

S: I forgot how to hug Mummy.

Me: Oh dear. Did you have to take some medicine or something?

S: Oh no. I just remembered again.

Trust

S (6 y/o, while under the kitchen table for some reason): Oh no! There's dirt stuck to my pyjamas. I knew I shouldn't have trusted these pyjamas.